Self-imposed amnesia

Self-imposed amnesia (I)

Like clutching an eraser,

Rubbing, rubbing,
Rubbing out a wrong word, a faulty comma,
A mistaken line, a paragraph
That shouldn’t be there,
I’m rubbing, rubbing
Rubbing out a wrong word, hurtful words,
A prickly deed,
A mistaken romance,
Lies to friends. 
Eraser dust flying
As memory crumbs and grains
And speck and sliver of pain
Winging and wheeling
But gradually falling
And gathering
Once again
Back to their origins.

 

Self-imposed amnesia (II)

Water,
I’m using water:
Diluting, diluting,
Thinning out the unwanted colours
Dense as a locked door;
Stale as the liquid from my stomach.
Envious green,
Furious red
That yellow –flat and torpid
And fearful black
Suffusing my heart’s canvas.
Diluting, diluting
Until
What remains
Is not purity
But pallor. 

By Tammy